The First SQL

A parody of the song “The First Noel”.  Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and so on and so forth…!

The first SQL the server did say
Could not parse this statement please write it this way.
In code where it lay a scanning the heap
On a production server I wanted to weep.
SQL SQL SQL SQL
Formed is the Team of S-Q-L.
 
I looked down and saw a star
Glaring in the code at me thus far
And to my eyes it gave great fright
And so it continued to my “delight”.
SQL SQL SQL SQL
Formed is the Team of S-Q-L.
 
And by the fright of that same star
DBAs came for the coding fubar;
To seek why a ping threw an event
And to destroy the RBAR whatever it meant.
SQL, SQL, SQL, SQL,
Formed is the Team of S-Q-L.
 
This star awry it went possessed;
Causing mayhem it did not rest,
And there it did not stop or stay,
Right inside my trace – zero disk space.
SQL, SQL, SQL, SQL,
Formed is the Team of S-Q-L.
 
They appeared with Admin’s decree,
I fell brazenly trying to flee,
And shuddered scared in their presence
Their scold and slur, I then did tense.
SQL, SQL, SQL, SQL,
Formed is the Team of S-Q-L.
 
Then we worked the code we abhorred
The select star was finally no more
That frickin bug we had finally caught
Was on a test server we forgot.
SQL, SQL, SQL, SQL,
Formed is the Team of S-Q-L.